So I'm currently studying Psychology and as of late I've been reading up on something called 'positive psychology', which partly looks at what us humans need to be 'happy'. Kind of ironic, seeing as this studying lark is making me want to tear my hair out. Now, if you asked me what I needed to be truly happy right now I would probably say the following:
- £1,000,000,000 give or take
- An unlimited amount of chocolate to attempt to satisfy my insatiable cravings
- A pony
- Another pony to keep that pony company
- A nice, chilled glass of wine
- A bigger pair of boobs (which I suppose I wouldn't have to worry about if I already had the funds, I'm not asking much)
Apparently, although I'm pretty sure all of the above would give me that *little* boost, money ain't all that... and probably none of the other 100 materialistic things I could reel off to you are either.
Without getting to wordy and technical, we all have a set-point or default level of happiness, usually determined by our genes. This set-point is a stable measure and usually doesn't waiver too much unless major life events occur i.e. death of a relative. However, after a certain period of time a healthy person would return to that default level of happiness eventually. This set-point counts for 50% of our overall happiness.
So that's 50% accounted for... Our life circumstances which includes our education level, martial status, income, culture etc. makes up a mere 10%of our overall happiness. I couldn't believe this when I first read it as to me, money = happiness. Money would solve most of, if not all my problems. A study by Diener and Oishi surveyed thousands of students across 41 countries and they found people who valued love more than money reported a far higher life satisfaction than those who were money-orientated.
Of course, winning £1,000,000,000 would make me very bloody happy. However, although changing life circumstances could increase my happiness in the short term, us humans are good at becoming habituated to our circumstances very easily. This means that although your happiness would improve, it would go back to your stable level of happiness quite quickly. It's called hedonic adaptation for all you fellow nerds out there. For example, I remember upgrading my car from a rusty, old Ford KA to a nearly new Ford Fiesta. Well, when I drove that car off of the forecourt, I wanted to put my shades on, roll those windows down and and blast my music (I wanted to, but I didn't. I'm not a complete nobhead). For the first few months, it felt good and it made me happy to drive that car. A year has passed and now I look at it and I don't get that special feeling I used to (
The last 40% of our overall happiness is made up by something called intentional activity. These are things we commit to and practice to enhance our happiness and well-being. This could be things like giving yourself that break even if it's an hour to destress and do something you enjoy whether that be play sports, or pamper yourself in the bath.
It also includes mindful thinking, such as gratitude. A simple exercise that helped me when I was feeling low was at the end of the day to think of three things that I was grateful for that day... I'm forever grateful for Channing Tatum for example.
In all seriousness, it really does help and because you're thinking of all the things you are grateful for, you stop thinking about the negative stuff! Especially good if you've had a crappy day. I think it's awesome that I can pretty much double my level of happiness by doing stuff I love to do. So I've made a list of things I want to do over the next few months:
- Socialise more with my friends. As we get older commitments get in the way but I really want to put in the effort to arrange meet-ups.
- Get back into horse riding. It was my passion when I was younger and I loved to do it!
- Have more Lush bubble baths - for me it's the ultimate way to relax
- Carry on going to the gym on a regular basis, remember those endorphins
- Plan more short trips away
So there you have it, that's my list of what I think are quite achievable goals to make myself happier. And I don't think I will need that £1,000,000,000 after all.
Even just spending 10 minutes reminiscing about what makes you happy makes you feel good in the moment. If you do make a list of intentional activities let me know what is on yours :)
Lucy x
Sources:
Diener, E and Oishi, S (2000) Money and Happiness: Income and subjective well-being across
nations
Dresdner Kleinwort Wasserstein Securities Limited 2004, http://www.lifecho.com/files/happiness.pdf
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