Without sounding like a full-on femi-nazi it feels really empowering and I feel for the first time that I can truly be myself, even in front of people I don't know. This may sound strange, but for me this was quite a big deal. I've always found I've been very closed off from people I don't know that well. I felt I could never fully relax and be myself as I think first impressions are really important and I was always worried about people not liking me. I spoke to many of my close friends about this as I thought it was interesting what their perception of me were, compared to someone's who didn't know me that well was. I feel the two perceptions were very different. Acquaintances would be 'shocked' by some dirty joke I would make because 'they didn't think I was like that' whereas my friends wouldn't bat an eyelid.
I feel now that I warm to people a lot quicker and can hold a conversation with strangers with ease (for the most part!) This is quite a challenge for someone who has suffered with anxiety. I don't know what specifically has caused this change. The only thing I can think of is that I've been pushing myself out of my comfort zone (see previous posts) and as cliché as it sounds.. it's really worked!
I just feel really positive at the moment and grateful for everyone and everything in my life. Here's a GIF of me dancing badly... I call it the 'Fuck what people think of me' dance. Try it, it's contagious!
Lucy x
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